SennaHalliday

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Yorkshire. Greedy. Weed. Women. Vegetarian.

samanndriel:

I am 120% ok with being someone’s trophy wife like hell yes I’ll just spend someone else’s money all day and wear cute lingerie forever where do I sign up

lurch6:

im gonna hire someone to stand behind me and say swag whenever i pause between words

cannibalsuxx:

i just spit my muffin out from laughter
  • mom: who are you laughing with?
  • me: my laptop

legfruit:

*throws apple into hospital* *doctors hiss and scurry away from it*

lindsaylohoean:

how many calories do u burn by sliding down a wall crying

teenscoolest:

losing everything but weight

lordbape:

straight men still pretending they don’t know and can’t recognize if another guy is handsome in 2013

neatvibes:

most common thought: damn haha im going to have to deal with that sooner or later

underthe-corktree:

*opens window and screams* AM I MORE THAN YOUVE BARGAINED FOR YET I’VE BEEN DYING TO TELL YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT TO HEAR CAUSE THATS JUST WHO I AM THIS WEEK

“I know today is Monday and you assume it’s going to suck, but according to statistics, there will be over 5,000 weddings, 10,000 childbirths, and 42 million hugs occurring today throughout the United States. Also today, there will be at least 4 people that will win the multimillion dollar lotteries, 600 people will get promotions at work, and 3,000 people will lose their virginity. There will also be 600 dogs adopted, 35,000 balloons sold, and 800,000 skittles eaten. Plus, the words “I love you” will be said over 9 million times. So again, I know today is Monday and you assume it’s going to suck, but just smile, because according to statistics, it should actually be a really nice day.”

(via p-erfect)